So we switch back to Caryn’s perspective. She apparently knows that BIGSHOCK! Alex is not a human. Yeah, he hides it SO well that nobody else could figure it out. So she sits there until Alex and Jessica walk by, flirting with each other in a way that is more nauseating than romantic.
“Are you stalking me?” she heard Jessica say to Alex in a light, maybe even flirtatious, tone.
“Because that is like, SO hot. Even though Edward Cullen won’t be written about for another few years, vampires stalking teenage girls that they want to kill will ALWAYS be sexy.”
Also, I’m not sure how this little conversation follows the last one. I mean, last time they were commiserating over their mutual hatred of Caryn, and now they’re heading over to where Caryn is so they can talk about… stalking. I guess they ran out of REAL topics to talk about.
Caryn frowned at how easily Jessica seemed to trust him. Alex was the last creature on Earth that any human should trust.
…. except for Charlie Sheen. That man is just bugnuts.
“Why would I do that? ” Alex asked with pretend innocence.
Translation: “I am so totally stalking you. I sneak into your bedroom to watch you sleep, cut your gas lines if you see anyone I don’t approve of, and regularly steal your all-black panties.”
Then again, why WOULD he do that? Oh yeah…
You know, I don’t even understand why he’s going to all this trouble. We soon discover that he’s been sent to find her… but for some reason he decided to do this by enrolling in high school and pretending to be a human. WHY? Why doesn’t he just go find her in her neighborhood and kill her in the bedroom she’s always hiding in, thus minimizing the number of people who see him and the amount of a trail he makes?
WHY DO THESE VAMPIRES ALWAYS GO TO FUCKING’ HIGH SCHOOL?! Don’t you have anything better to do with ETERNITY of IMMORTALITY than dick around in a big building filled with teenagers? Isn’t there some way you could go about your vampirey business WITHOUT enrolling at a school and spending day after day dealing with vapid bimbos who want to be immortal?
Why indeed? Caryn thought. Maybe because you’re a manipulative leech?
… do manipulative leeches usually stalk people?
“Anyway, I’m not quite so obvious when I’m stalking someone,” Alex was saying to Jessica, amusement in his voice.
“I creep into their bedrooms and watch them sleep in a creepy rapey way. That’s much subtler.”
Caryn shook her head. Of course you are, she thought. If they don’t know you’re there, they aren’t afraid.
And since you’re another Abercrombie and Fitch model pretending to be a hawt vampire teenager… they might just not be afraid because you’re not scary.
Suddenly she heard his mocking voice clearly in her mind. I suppose you would know from experience?
… uh, what does that mean? So, he’s implying that she knows from experience that if she doesn’t know he’s there, she isn’t afraid? I’m confused.
She threw up her mental shields, even though she knew they were little better than glass against his kind.
Then why bother having them at all?
Also, why do her vampires have telepathy? Did it just seem too cool to not include it?
Get out of my head, she thought angrily. Alex laughed in return.
Yeah, I totally couldn’t resist.
And while he’s mindfucking Caryn, Alex is also holding a conversation with Jessica. My, he’s a multitasker. And in case you’re wondering, no, Jessica is no longer worried about the fact that this guy looks EXACTLY like the main character of her books. And she apparently hasn’t noticed that she’s being all cuddly and flirty with him, while treating everyone else like turds on legs – I would find my strange mood swing a little suspicious.
Friends with the leeches but not with the humans, Caryn thought bitterly.
But of course! She is a Sue in a vampire story, which means that the vampires are superior to us maggoty little humans in EVERY WAY.
She couldn’t exactly blame Jessica, though.
Then how come she just DID?
So it turns out that Alex is somehow using his Vampire Mind Powers to make people like him. This… actually makes sense. You’d expect vampires to have some way of luring in their prey, especially since their prey is smart enough to avoid them. This is actually the first good idea that Atwater-Rhodes has had… and this is Chapter 7. God help me.
Caryn forced herself to start her homework rather than think about Alex and Jessica any longer. She had no fighting skills with which to defend Jessica physically.
… which raises the question of why they sent her. I mean, why didn’t they send someone who could kick some ass, since apparently there ARE witches who can kick ass? In fact, the next book INCLUDES one such witch, so why did they send JUST ONE WITCH who can’t kick ass?
So because Jessica wouldn’t listen to Caryn if she said the sky was blue, and because they’re in a library surrounded by helpless humans, Caryn decides to… do absolutely nothing.
This ENTIRE CHAPTER is fucking pointless!
Arguing with a vampire in the middle of a crowd would only get people killed.
Because when a vampire says they ordered ham on rye, they don’t want any backtalk! Blood will be spilled unless they get ham on rye!